by The Ativans

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released August 7, 2015

Produced by Casey Lewis and The Ativans
Recorded, Mixed, and Mastered by Casey Lewis at Echo Base Studio
All songs arranged and performed by The Ativans
Written by Billy Dixon



all rights reserved


The Ativans Calgary, Alberta

The Ativans have been a pop punk fixture in dive bars, basements, and cool haunts across Western Canada since forming in Calgary in 2012.

Over the past 5 years, the Ativans have been delivering the party while sharing stages with the likes of Chixdiggit, The Copyrights, Teenage Bottlerocket, and Agent Orange.
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Track Name: Bucket List
Well I got to the end of this road
Burning bridges wherever I’d go
But I promise you this
I am getting my kicks
So fuck you this is my bucket list

Well I got sick of living a lie
Counting down to death from nine to five
So I’m learning new tricks
While you all take the piss
And I’m living out my bucket list

So I’ll live in the fast lane wherever I go
And I’ll take all those chances before I get old
So I’ll live in this bliss
Of ignorance, I insist
And I’m living out my bucket list

But I promise you this
I am getting my kicks
So fuck you this is my bucket list
Track Name: Up in Smoke
Guess it all caught up with me
I used to think I was so bloody clever
Never thought I’d feel so small
Really it’s only my fault

I’m getting good at letting go
But still I wanted you to know
I won’t forget you

I think finally understand that
The morale of the story’s a joke
Still I never thought it’d all go up in smoke

I guess it’s always been sink or swim
You took off before the winter weather
Never thought it could be so cold
It felt worse being all by myself

I used to believe that things happened for good reason
But never thought you’d be leaving
Track Name: Or Whatever
I guess it's been a couple minutes
I tried to run but pulled up lame
You never thought that I would grow up, nothing has changed.

I still listen to the same bands
The ones you hated at the time
I never asked, but guess that you have got on with your life

Well I know it’s not your fault
And I’m the one to blame
But do you ever lie awake and feel the same?
I used to think forever would last for longer than we had,
but now I know that it was too good to be true
Do you ever think that we’ll end up together? Or whatever

It’s like I never left this city
Everything still looks the same
You never thought that I would settle down, maybe I’ll change

I saw a picture of a memory
A window to another life
I used to think that it would work out, but you we’re always right

I don't believe them anymore
I cant live for what was before anymore
Track Name: Jump the Shark
Last night I had a dream that you and I
Got stranded on a desert isle
In black and white we lived a TV dream
Woke up again to the color bars screen

Sometimes the same old makes me want to run away
This feels like a rerun so I guess I gotta say
The Sharks are circling, so I'm jumping away

Bored of this episode its all same
Don't want to grow up but I want to change
They don't know me they don't understand
The next commercial break I'll make my plans

Sometimes the same old makes me want to run away
This feels like a rerun so I guess I gotta say
The Sharks are circling, so I'm jumping away
Track Name: Nostalgia Blues
I never thought that anyone could feel the same way
The walls are getting closer and the rooms spinning again
Time moves slow it always seems till it gets pissed away
I’m over my bad habit’s but I’ll quit another day

I chase the small things but they always get away
I’m looking for another way

Well I don’t know what to do
But I’ve got nothing to lose
So say the word and I will run away with you

Well I’m paying all my dues
And dreaming of old news
I’m sick of being stuck in these nostalgia blues

Every time I hear that song I think about your face
and remember the first time that we snuck into your place
I feel like I’m too old to be caught up in yesterdays
I’m getting sick of hanging out and wasting time away

One day I’ll figure out how it all got away
and why I always I think about you
I chase the small things but they always get away
I’m looking for another way
Track Name: Nine to June
Ice cracked under my feet before I feel through
Sun down the season has come and gone
18 on halloween before I met you
Winter lasts way to fucking long

Well I’m losing track of time
As the snow piles up outside
Grey clouds fill up the sky, at least I have you

And I know you feel the same, we’ll forsake these shorter days
And change TV channels all fucking day, June’s too far away

Dead leaves from empty trees line the sidewalk
The pavement looks so cold and pale
I fell into a dream with my coat off
With you I want to run away

Well it’s so cold outside and these days there just isn’t much to do
So we’ll get sucked into the television set just me and you
The days are getting short we can’t control the weather
You said it won’t be long, last time I looked it still says nine to June.
Track Name: McFly
Distorted by the views of all these regular people
Move my mouth but still I cannot talk
I'm addicted to the dregs of these necessity evils
Cannot change although I heed my flaws.

Amused by the inane I guess I'm bored of existence
Medications to control my thoughts
Desensitized with no ability for rationalization
Can someone tell me what this thing is called

So what? I have something to tell you but I can't explain my thoughts
Go on, Here I will be waiting and forget my needs to feed my wants

My ears fucking ringing from the deafening silence
But I don't know how to make it stop
Is there a pill that I can take to make me feel like a something?
Is there a cure for being oblivious

Decided undecided someone make a decision
Disagreed can we agree at all
Records scattered on the floor I think I need some direction
Will someone catch me when its time to fall
Track Name: With Me
In a moment I could see just how insane
Existence would be without you
Forever only lasts a lifetime
I Compromise a little smile but faked it anyway
Think about the times

Never learned how not to be so insecure
Liquid courage apathetic
Hungover and stuck in traffic
But when I think about your face, it always feels the same
I broke another lie

I thought you'd go another way
I didn't think that you would stay
I never though't I'd see the day
You would say that you would never leave and always be with me.

I got a blank stare always staring at my phone
Attention span is always failing
Forever only lasts a lifetime
I Compromise a little smile but faked it anyway
maybe another time
Track Name: Jimmy's Lunchbox
It's been two years I don't feel right
I'm sick and tired of this fight
They don't believe in me

Come break me out, I can't stay
I'll hustle rubes along the way
To Armageddon

You can try but you won't find me
I won't make a sound
I'm hitchhiking across the desert
I'm California bound

I met my match along the way
Lucas used a glove to play
He's a rad racer

But I will get my revenge
At Video Armageddon
I'll blow the whistle

I've got these pictures left inside
The dinosaur we saw roadside
Track Name: From the Outside
It kinda feels like the same song stuck in my head
I need reprieve from the same old same old
Cause everything is fucking mental

I never thought I would ever be here again
Dead soldiers coax stories of old glory
And everyone is pixilated

Just cuz I don’t remember all the stupid shit I did before
What makes you think that I want to be told
I’m used to failing and the best you’ll ever meet at wasting time
I’ll keep on looking in from the outside

Can’t understand all the things getting put in my head
Hear the words but I can’t make sense
I never learned to pay attention

The longest part of life is the middle but then
you grab for earth as you fall down hill
Well fuck you I’m invincible